LYRICS

NORMAN (I’VE DROPPED MY CUP OF TEA)

Norman, I’ve dropped my cup of tea Will you please pick it up And put the tea back in it? Do it quickly Or I'll hit you Norman, please build a time machine Use it to go back in time Before I dropped the teacup And stop me dropping it Or I’ll kill you Suck the tea off the carpet Then glue the cup back together And spit the tea back into it Then remove your spit from the tea You might have to buy a centrifuge From the science lab on the corner But don't think I'm gonna pay for it It'll have to come out of your wages Norman – And if you don't succeed I will force you to go back in time Again and again Until there’s loads of you In my living room And when there are enough of you I will force you to kiss yourself In front of your Mum And then there will be A big explosion I pressed my face to the window And pressed it harder and harder And then I kept on pressing it Till my face went through the window I drew a cock on the carpet And did a crap on top of it Then I screamed “Daddy” But he never came - oh oh oh oh oh Norman – you are my Daddy now Do things a Daddy should do Like repaying my debts And talking backwards Norman – I’m foaming at the mouth Will you please catch the foam in the cup I’ve been talking about? And then drink it Or you will suffer My plan for infinite Normans My plan for infinite Normans The body’s in the woods I left it in a car The registration number is “B0 OB5” It sort of spells “boobs” I did it as a joke See, I have got a sense of humour No matter what you think Ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha Why aren't you laughing, Norman? Ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha Norman

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