LYRICS

MY VENETIAN BLIND

I like to hang it up across my window It’s so beautiful and elegant And cultured and refined My Venetian blind My Venetian blind I like to carry it to cocktail parties It’s so useful when I need something That I can hide behind My Venetian blind My Venetian I like to hold it up in front of my head, so So people cannot see what faces I’m pulling And if I ever want to see where I’m going, I Open and shut Open and shut It is the single greatest thing that's ever been Invented in the entire history of humankind My Venetian blind My Venetian blind I had to see a special mental doctor When the metal strips and my intimate parts Became entwined My Venetian blind My Venetian I like to cuddle it in public places I like to kiss it in the supermarket I ask it serious advice about my finances Open and shut Open and shut I want to go where the horses run Beneath the baking of the desert sun Where the snakes all slither and wind I wonder, are they all blind? In Venetia, in Venetia, in Venetia Where the camels dump And the carpets fly Where they wear them smocks The ones that cover you up Are they all shy like me? Or are they just dead cold? I think it’s where they filmed Star Wars And Lawrence of Whatsisname I should look it up But I can't be bothered No, I can't be bothered It's so boring, boring, boring And I can't be bothered to do the research No, I can't be arsed

Shut Up Mum >

< Norman