As someone with absolutely no interest in sport whatsoever, I’m very surprised at how much
sport-related content there is in my Fairburn work. This is the first piece I wrote about my
own life at Fairburn and it’s about a football match between our school and another school
in one of the neighbouring villages. These games were quite frequent, taking place at least
once a half-term between ourselves and the junior schools of either Burton Salmon or
Brotherton. Not only is this the first such match I ever played, it’s also probably the first
proper football match I ever played, full stop. Prior to this, it hadn’t ever really occurred to
me to do it. I’m sure some kids probably played football at my previous school but I certainly
wasn’t one of them. I wasn’t averse to kicking a ball about every now and again with my
mates, but I had no real understanding of the rules of football and had never been
interested in it as a spectator sport. Oh yes, I loved watching the football results at the end
of Grandstand, but only because it meant Doctor Who was about to start.
At Fairburn, however, liking football was mandatory. Playtimes (there were three daily - mid-
morning, lunchtime and mid-afternoon) were dominated by the sport. The L-shaped junior
playground was basically a big concrete football pitch, a game being held virtually every
single break in the main section of the yard. Girls weren’t allowed to play, of course, meaning
they were relegated to the tiny area round the side of the school by the toilets. As far as the
boys were concerned, if you didn’t play football, you were a girl. Over time, I would come to
hate this and eventually rebelled against it (and sport in general), but when I first moved to
Fairburn, all I wanted was to be accepted. Though occasionally I would stare enviously into
the infants playground, where they were allowed to run around making silly noises and mess
about on the climbing frame.
Fitting in was an uphill struggle. I was marked out as a freak straight away because of my
Bristol City bag. The other boys all supported Leeds United without question, so a bag
proclaiming support for Bristol City clearly wouldn’t be tolerated. What made it worse was
that I didn’t support Bristol City anyway - I just liked the bag because it was red (I really, really
liked red) and of the three bags available in Thourgood’s sweet shop that day, it was
definitely the most visually appealing. Since I was new, the other kids gave me the benefit of
the doubt and tutored me in the ways of Fairburn. By the end of the year, I had a Leeds
United bag instead, plus a Leeds United away strip (yellow shirt and blue shorts), a Leeds
United towel and a pair of football boots. After which, I was fully accepted.
This match against Burton Salmon was a test. Though I’d played football in the playground,
when it came to a proper match against another school, I was an unknown quantity. Hence
sitting on the substitute bench for the first half. When it came to my position as “defender” -
well, I didn’t have the passion to be a striker and I hated being in goal (didn’t like having balls
kicked at me, to be frank), so defence was a good place for me. As I remember, to my
surprise, the other boys all agreed I performed quite admirably - we won this match after all,
despite the opposing team being “up our end” for most of the match, so I probably did
something right. Before long, I had a reputation amongst my peers as a “good defender”.
The real man of the match though was obviously Wayne Kelsey. Even though he was only in
the second year, Wayne had a reputation for being the hardest kid in Fairburn - or, as we
would call him, “the cock of the school”. In all my time there, I don’t recall him ever hitting
anyone, but the threat of it was enough, and this reputation obviously spread to Burton
Salmon, where the players would rather pass him the ball than tackle him. Even Mr Geraghty
called him “Danger Man Kelsey”. It was always best to stay out of his way on the pitch.
Four last things to say: I don’t remember Mrs Milner but we often had supply teachers,
especially when the class was split into groups; I appear to have forgotten how to spell “and”;
this is the earliest surviving example of me writing about my own life; and this is one of
several examples of me being a tell-tale tit - but I’ll talk more about that later.
Fairburn v Burton Salmon
TERM 1
Sept-Dec 1979
TOPIC 1
Sept-Dec 1979
HISTORY 1
Sept 1979 - Oct 1981
SCIENCE 1
Sept 1979 - Mar 1980
GEOGRAPHY 1
Sept 1979 - Feb 1981
Clarke Hall
Old Houses
Fairburn v Burton Salmon
The Forgotten World
String Orchestra
Sheet Lightning
Grezelda the Witch
Bonfire Night
Metropolitan Police
Christmas 1979
Great Space Battles
Luddenden
The Hat’s Adventure
Sleeping Beauty
What I Do On Monday
Waen Shepherd 2
Waen Shepherd in: Green Squids
Ward’s 7: Move of the Galaxy
Ward’s 7: Alpha Centauri
Ward’s 7: Escape to Mother Ship
Ward’s 7: Death Planet
Blake’s 7
Ward’s 7: The Hunt
Ward’s 7: Rescue
The Flame in the Desert
The Fugitive
British Skiing Events
Fiends of the Eastern Front
Apeth (from Outer Space!)
Tedosaurus (from Prehistoric Time!)
A Walk in Our Village
The Mountain Called Tyrannosaurus Rex
Florence Nightingale
War of the Worlds
The Micronauts in: Supersilver
As someone with absolutely no interest in sport whatsoever,
I’m very surprised at how much sport-related content there is
in my Fairburn work. This is the first piece I wrote about my
own life at Fairburn and it’s about a football match between
our school and another school in one of the neighbouring
villages. These games were quite frequent, taking place at least
once a half-term between ourselves and the junior schools of
either Burton Salmon or Brotherton. Not only is this the first
such match I ever played, it’s also probably the first proper
football match I ever played, full stop. Prior to this, it hadn’t
ever really occurred to me to do it. I’m sure some kids probably
played football at my previous school but I certainly wasn’t one
of them. I wasn’t averse to kicking a ball about every now and
again with my mates, but I had no real understanding of the
rules of football and had never been interested in it as a
spectator sport. Oh yes, I loved watching the football results at
the end of Grandstand, but only because it meant Doctor Who
was about to start.
At Fairburn, however, liking football was mandatory. Playtimes
(there were three daily - mid-morning, lunchtime and mid-
afternoon) were dominated by the sport. The L-shaped junior
playground was basically a big concrete football pitch, a game
being held virtually every single break in the main section of
the yard. Girls weren’t allowed to play, of course, meaning they
were relegated to the tiny area round the side of the school by
the toilets. As far as the boys were concerned, if you didn’t play
football, you were a girl. Over time, I would come to hate this
and eventually rebelled against it (and sport in general), but
when I first moved to Fairburn, all I wanted was to be accepted.
Though occasionally I would stare enviously into the infants
playground, where they were allowed to run around making
silly noises and mess about on the climbing frame.
Fitting in was an uphill struggle. I was marked out as a freak
straight away because of my Bristol City bag. The other boys all
supported Leeds United without question, so a bag
proclaiming support for Bristol City clearly wouldn’t be
tolerated. What made it worse was that I didn’t support Bristol
City anyway - I just liked the bag because it was red (I really,
really liked red) and of the three bags available in Thourgood’s
sweet shop that day, it was definitely the most visually
appealing. Since I was new, the other kids gave me the benefit
of the doubt and tutored me in the ways of Fairburn. By the
end of the year, I had a Leeds United bag instead, plus a Leeds
United away strip (yellow shirt and blue shorts), a Leeds United
towel and a pair of football boots. After which, I was fully
accepted.
This match against Burton Salmon was a test. Though I’d
played football in the playground, when it came to a proper
match against another school, I was an unknown quantity.
Hence sitting on the substitute bench for the first half. When it
came to my position as “defender” - well, I didn’t have the
passion to be a striker and I hated being in goal (didn’t like
having balls kicked at me, to be frank), so defence was a good
place for me. As I remember, to my surprise, the other boys all
agreed I performed quite admirably - we won this match after
all, despite the opposing team being “up our end” for most of
the match, so I probably did something right. Before long, I had
a reputation amongst my peers as a “good defender”.
The real man of the match though was obviously Wayne
Kelsey. Even though he was only in the second year, Wayne
had a reputation for being the hardest kid in Fairburn - or, as
we would call him, “the cock of the school”. In all my time
there, I don’t recall him ever hitting anyone, but the threat of it
was enough, and this reputation obviously spread to Burton
Salmon, where the players would rather pass him the ball than
tackle him. Even Mr Geraghty called him “Danger Man Kelsey”.
It was always best to stay out of his way on the pitch.
Four last things to say: I don’t remember Mrs Milner but we
often had supply teachers, especially when the class was split
into groups; I appear to have forgotten how to spell “and”; this
is the earliest surviving example of me writing about my own
life; and this is one of several examples of me being a tell-tale
tit - but I’ll talk more about that later.
Fairburn v Burton Salmon
TERM 1
Sept-Dec 1979
TOPIC 1
Sept-Dec 1979
HISTORY 1
Sept 1979 - Oct 1981
SCIENCE 1
Sept 1979 - Mar 1980
GEOGRAPHY 1
Sept 1979 - Feb 1981
