Out of Sight, Out of Mind
After my first humiliating day at Fairburn School, I figured it was best to get my head down,
do as I was told and try to fit in as much as possible. That means I didn’t go out of my way to
stand out or make an exhibition of myself. If you doubt my capability of remembering that
far back, well, I don’t blame you, so do I. But the caution is very evident in this piece.
On Thursday October 11, 1979, the North Yorkshire County Council String Orchestra visited
our school and this is just a simple write-up of what happened. Having grown up with young
parents (they were 18 when I was born) who listened to Led Zeppelin and Jimi Hendrix,
classical music was alien to me and it’s doubtful I would have heard any played live before.
The strange punctuation bears this out. Maybe I was just having a bad day - I still spelt most
nouns with capital letters and I thought both North-Yorkshire and County-Council were
hyphenated - but it seems I was paying attention when someone pointed out that cello was
an abbreviation of violoncello and should therefore be spelt with an apostrophe. It’s not a
memory I retained into adulthood though, so my discovery that I knew this as a child is quite
a surprise.
Whether I truly enjoyed the concert isn’t really evident, though I do say the tunes were “very
good” and it’s clear I got a kick out of the jauntier material - Plink Plank Plonk (complete with
swanee whistle) is singled out for praise. But it’s obvious I didn’t enjoy it anywhere near as
much as the other kids, and that’s where the caution comes in. When “the man” asks us if we
want to join in, “I didn’t put my hand up but lots of people did.” Now, this could be just
because I had no interest in music. That clearly isn’t true. The only other conclusion I can
draw is that I really didn’t want to draw attention to myself.
The thing is, I couldn’t help standing out, mainly on account of my hair. Though there were
quite a high proportion of blonde-haired boys at Fairburn School, I was still the blondest boy
anyone had ever seen. I mean, this wasn’t standard blonde hair - it was almost white. This
had been a problem all my life - adults would assume I was a girl because boys weren’t
supposed to have white hair, and kids would just use it as an excuse to call me names - first
“Blondie”, then the slightly more creative “Debbie Harry”, and eventually other, more hurtful
names which I’ll keep to myself for the moment, thanks. The point is, I stood out in a crowd,
which when you factor in my weird sense of humour, my love of sci-fi and my inability to
choose the right bag, meant I was a prime target for bullying. I’d experienced a little of it
before I came to Fairburn and I didn’t want it to happen here. So I had to keep my head
down, shut up and fit in as much as I possibly could.
It wouldn’t last. By the time 1980 rolled around I was beginning to show my true colours and
eventually took my rightful place as the biggest show-off in the village. But in this piece, the
show-offs appear to be David - who I assume must be David Bramley, then a 4th year junior
and thus one of the oldest boys in the school, and can be seen beaming at the back of this
photograph - and Paula, who I’m sad to say I don’t remember at all. I wonder, if I’d never kept
those photographs or these books, how many other Fairburn kids I would have forgotten
about. I wonder if any of them remember me.
The Orchestra of Doubt
When I first re-read this as an adult, I doubted whether North Yorkshire County Council
actually had a string orchestra and even doubted there was such a thing as “North Yorkshire
County Council”. I didn’t really believe the largest county in Britain would seriously have its
own council. But I was wrong, which goes to show how much I know about the way my
country is governed. They no longer appear to have their own orchestra* but we lived in a
semi-socialist society back then, when the gas, electricity, water, trains and even the bloody
telephone service were state-owned. We even used a quaint olde-worlde fuel called coal and
that was state-owned too. So of course the council had its own taxpayer-funded orchestra.
They were clearly very good at what they did. Playing tunes on sandpaper, making a double
bass sound like an elephant - I wonder if this is where the 80s incarnation of King Crimson
got some of their ideas? I’m very impressed. Not so impressed with their selection of songs
for us to guess though. Keel Row? John Brown? Early One Morning? Never heard of them.
Finally, I wonder, what is a “lang” and why would you write a song about its eye? Was I
thinking of Fritz Lang? Did I think it was some kind of animal? Maybe it produced lang’s wool
as well and you could eat a nice lang chop for your Sunday dinner. I suppose you can forgive
a seven year old Sassenach for not knowing what Auld Lang Syne means - actually, I’m quite
impressed that I knew how to spell “auld”.
The amazing thing is, I still got a tick from the teacher, despite the glaring error. How
marvellously easy it must have been to be a teacher in those days, just a tick and you’re
done. My wife has to fill in all kinds of forms when she marks books, and that’s just for four
year olds.
*Since writing this article in 2010, I’ve discovered that, although North Yorkshire County Council
still doesn’t have its own orchestra, it does in fact run a service called the Music Hub, which works
with other arts organisations to improve the quality of local music services.
String Orchestra
TERM 1
Sept-Dec 1979
TOPIC 1
Sept-Dec 1979
HISTORY 1
Sept 1979 - Oct 1981
SCIENCE 1
Sept 1979 - Mar 1980
GEOGRAPHY 1
Sept 1979 - Feb 1981
STRING ORCHESTRA PLAYLIST
John Brown’s Body
The Lords
Early One Morning
Nana Mouskouri
Home Sweet Home
Deanna Durbin
Pop Goes the Weasel
Anthony Newley
Clarke Hall
Old Houses
Fairburn v Burton Salmon
The Forgotten World
String Orchestra
Sheet Lightning
Grezelda the Witch
Bonfire Night
Metropolitan Police
Christmas 1979
Great Space Battles
Luddenden
The Hat’s Adventure
Sleeping Beauty
What I Do On Monday
Waen Shepherd 2
Waen Shepherd in: Green Squids
Ward’s 7: Move of the Galaxy
Ward’s 7: Alpha Centauri
Ward’s 7: Escape to Mother Ship
Ward’s 7: Death Planet
Blake’s 7
Ward’s 7: The Hunt
Ward’s 7: Rescue
The Flame in the Desert
The Fugitive
British Skiing Events
Fiends of the Eastern Front
Apeth (from Outer Space!)
Tedosaurus (from Prehistoric Time!)
A Walk in Our Village
The Mountain Called Tyrannosaurus Rex
Florence Nightingale
War of the Worlds
The Micronauts in: Supersilver
Out of Sight, Out of Mind
After my first humiliating day at Fairburn School, I figured it was
best to get my head down, do as I was told and try to fit in as
much as possible. That means I didn’t go out of my way to
stand out or make an exhibition of myself. If you doubt my
capability of remembering that far back, well, I don’t blame you,
so do I. But the caution is very evident in this piece.
On Thursday October 11, 1979, the North Yorkshire County
Council String Orchestra visited our school and this is just a
simple write-up of what happened. Having grown up with
young parents (they were 18 when I was born) who listened to
Led Zeppelin and Jimi Hendrix, classical music was alien to me
and it’s doubtful I would have heard any played live before. The
strange punctuation bears this out. Maybe I was just having a
bad day - I still spelt most nouns with capital letters and I
thought both North-Yorkshire and County-Council were
hyphenated - but it seems I was paying attention when
someone pointed out that cello was an abbreviation of
violoncello and should therefore be spelt with an apostrophe.
It’s not a memory I retained into adulthood though, so my
discovery that I knew this as a child is quite a surprise.
Whether I truly enjoyed the concert isn’t really evident, though I
do say the tunes were “very good” and it’s clear I got a kick out
of the jauntier material - Plink Plank Plonk (complete with
swanee whistle) is singled out for praise. But it’s obvious I didn’t
enjoy it anywhere near as much as the other kids, and that’s
where the caution comes in. When “the man” asks us if we want
to join in, “I didn’t put my hand up but lots of people did.” Now,
this could be just because I had no interest in music. That
clearly isn’t true. The only other conclusion I can draw is that I
really didn’t want to draw attention to myself.
The thing is, I couldn’t help standing out, mainly on account of
my hair. Though there were quite a high proportion of blonde-
haired boys at Fairburn School, I was still the blondest boy
anyone had ever seen. I mean, this wasn’t standard blonde hair
- it was almost white. This had been a problem all my life -
adults would assume I was a girl because boys weren’t
supposed to have white hair, and kids would just use it as an
excuse to call me names - first “Blondie”, then the slightly more
creative “Debbie Harry”, and eventually other, more hurtful
names which I’ll keep to myself for the moment, thanks. The
point is, I stood out in a crowd, which when you factor in my
weird sense of humour, my love of sci-fi and my inability to
choose the right bag, meant I was a prime target for bullying. I’d
experienced a little of it before I came to Fairburn and I didn’t
want it to happen here. So I had to keep my head down, shut
up and fit in as much as I possibly could.
It wouldn’t last. By the time 1980 rolled around I was beginning
to show my true colours and eventually took my rightful place
as the biggest show-off in the village. But in this piece, the
show-offs appear to be David - who I assume must be David
Bramley, then a 4th year junior and thus one of the oldest boys
in the school, and can be seen beaming at the back of this
photograph - and Paula, who I’m sad to say I don’t remember at
all. I wonder, if I’d never kept those photographs or these
books, how many other Fairburn kids I would have forgotten
about. I wonder if any of them remember me.
The Orchestra of Doubt
When I first re-read this as an adult, I doubted whether North
Yorkshire County Council actually had a string orchestra and
even doubted there was such a thing as “North Yorkshire
County Council”. I didn’t really believe the largest county in
Britain would seriously have its own council. But I was wrong,
which goes to show how much I know about the way my
country is governed. They no longer appear to have their own
orchestra* but we lived in a semi-socialist society back then,
when the gas, electricity, water, trains and even the bloody
telephone service were state-owned. We even used a quaint
olde-worlde fuel called coal and that was state-owned too. So
of course the council had its own taxpayer-funded orchestra.
They were clearly very good at what they did. Playing tunes on
sandpaper, making a double bass sound like an elephant - I
wonder if this is where the 80s incarnation of King Crimson got
some of their ideas? I’m very impressed. Not so impressed with
their selection of songs for us to guess though. Keel Row? John
Brown? Early One Morning? Never heard of them.
Finally, I wonder, what is a “lang” and why would you write a
song about its eye? Was I thinking of Fritz Lang? Did I think it
was some kind of animal? Maybe it produced lang’s wool as
well and you could eat a nice lang chop for your Sunday dinner.
I suppose you can forgive a seven year old Sassenach for not
knowing what Auld Lang Syne means - actually, I’m quite
impressed that I knew how to spell “auld”.
The amazing thing is, I still got a tick from the teacher, despite
the glaring error. How marvellously easy it must have been to
be a teacher in those days, just a tick and you’re done. My wife
has to fill in all kinds of forms when she marks books, and
that’s just for four year olds.
*Since writing this article in 2010, I’ve discovered that, although
North Yorkshire County Council still doesn’t have its own orchestra,
it does in fact run a service called the Music Hub, which works with
other arts organisations to improve the quality of local music
services.
String Orchestra
STRING ORCHESTRA PLAYLIST
John Brown’s Body
The Lords
Early One Morning
Nana Mouskouri
Home Sweet Home
Deanna Durbin
Pop Goes the Weasel
Anthony Newley
TERM 1
Sept-Dec 1979
TOPIC 1
Sept-Dec 1979
HISTORY 1
Sept 1979 - Oct 1981
SCIENCE 1
Sept 1979 - Mar 1980
GEOGRAPHY 1
Sept 1979 - Feb 1981
