Lazer Lash is the fourth or fifth comic strip in this book (depending on which ones you
count) and probably the stupidest. It appears to take place in a futuristic world where
everyone has the word ‘laser’ at the beginning of their name - not sure exactly whether it’s a
title like ‘Doctor’ or a descriptor like ‘Little Red’ Riding Hood - but they’re not all necessarily
on the same side. They also can’t spell ‘laser’ properly - or rather, they could spell laser
properly for half a page, then changed their minds and retconned it with a Z.
Like Supersilver, Electro and Giant Karza before him, our hero isn’t a hero at all, but a villain.
He starts off by killing a man in the street for a reason we’re not party to. His boss, Laser Jim
5 (who you can tell is evil because he’s bald and wears an eyepatch), congratulates him on
his good work, suggesting some kind of cold-war-style espionage scenario, but within
moments Lazer Lash is being chased by the cops, which might mean they’re just criminals.
He’s also, apparently, not human. Lazer Jim 5, Laser John One and the Laser Cops all appear
to be people as we’d normally understand them, but Lazer Lash is different. His name tells
me he’s probably made out of pure laser, but I might not have had a clear grasp of what a
laser is. From the look of him (and the fact that he gives the Laser Cop an electric shock), I’d
say he’s more likely to be made of pure electricity. But he can also shoot lethal lasers out of
his eye (only one eye, mind - his laser eye) and, bizarrely, being hit by a laser beam makes
him explode. These definitely aren’t the same lasers that read DVDs or correct your eyesight.
There’s a question mark at the end, as if to suggest the story might not quite be over. But let
me reassure you, it absolutely is. I never returned to this world, which is a shame because I’d
really love to have met some of the other Lazer Jims and find out if they’re just as rubbish as
this one. But I can live with that.
THE END?
April/May, 1980
Lazer Lash
Woman Line
Which of these five
squiggly lines leads to
the woman?
Captain Carnivore
Gary Shepherd is
hunted down by a
deadly flying meteor
TOPIC 1
He knows the names of
all the dinosaurs
Waen Shepherd 2
Waen’s heroic antics in
the far-flung future of
2007 AD!
Lazer Lash
April/May, 1980
Fiends of the Eastern
Front
Vampires, paraphrased
from 2000 AD
Tedosaurus
Prehistoric fun with a
teddy bear the size of a
dinosaur!
Super Jesus
A special pin-up of your
favourite Nazarene
webslinger
Lazer Lash is the fourth or fifth comic strip in this
book (depending on which ones you count) and
probably the stupidest. It appears to take place in a
futuristic world where everyone has the word ‘laser’
at the beginning of their name - not sure exactly
whether it’s a title like ‘Doctor’ or a descriptor like
‘Little Red’ Riding Hood - but they’re not all
necessarily on the same side. They also can’t spell
‘laser’ properly - or rather, they could spell laser
properly for half a page, then changed their minds
and retconned it with a Z.
Like Supersilver, Electro and Giant Karza before
him, our hero isn’t a hero at all, but a villain. He
starts off by killing a man in the street for a reason
we’re not party to. His boss, Laser Jim 5 (who you
can tell is evil because he’s bald and wears an
eyepatch), congratulates him on his good work,
suggesting some kind of cold-war-style espionage
scenario, but within moments Lazer Lash is being
chased by the cops, which might mean they’re just
criminals.
He’s also, apparently, not human. Lazer Jim 5, Laser
John One and the Laser Cops all appear to be
people as we’d normally understand them, but
Lazer Lash is different. His name tells me he’s
probably made out of pure laser, but I might not
have had a clear grasp of what a laser is. From the
look of him (and the fact that he gives the Laser Cop
an electric shock), I’d say he’s more likely to be
made of pure electricity. But he can also shoot
lethal lasers out of his eye (only one eye, mind - his
laser eye) and, bizarrely, being hit by a laser beam
makes him explode. These definitely aren’t the
same lasers that read DVDs or correct your
eyesight.
There’s a question mark at the end, as if to suggest
the story might not quite be over. But let me
reassure you, it absolutely is. I never returned to
this world, which is a shame because I’d really love
to have met some of the other Lazer Jims and find
out if they’re just as rubbish as this one. But I can
live with that.
THE END?
Woman Line
Which of these five
squiggly lines leads to
the woman?